I'm Good

Parade of pity… well no thanks… every time someone asks me, oh how’s TA doing, hope things are going well with you two and then I respond, oh we’ve gone our separate ways, they always say sorry or I’m sure you’ll find someone else and so on and so on… and I reply, no need to be sorry, I’m not… I’m not looking for a pity party, by all means I’ve had my fair share of break up and pity parties (which I normally welcomes to get my mind off things), but this time around, no thanks… I don’t need or want a pity party cause I think that things worked out the way they were suppose to and I have no regrets… I’ve been meeting so many new people lately and making time to hang out with the friends that I had slowly abandoned once I got into my relationship with TA… not typically me, but I was just got sucked into the relationship, which I guess should have been another sign… anyways, I’ve been to a few new places that I’d never even heard of, and probably wouldn’t have ever had a chance to go to in my previous situation…. Now TA and I didn’t end on the best of terms, actually we were both a bit upset, but there’s nothing I can do about that now… and while I’m good (as Kanye would say), I’m not going to pretend that my entire relationship with TA was bad or horrible, that would be a straight up lie… obviously there were enough good times, hence the reason we were together… and granted I haven’t seen him or spoken to him since we split, but I’m sure the day will come when we’ll run into each other… and when that time comes, I hope we can smile and chat like friends do, but if not then I at least hope that we can exchange pleasantries and then go out separate ways with no unnecessary drama… I honestly would like to be friends with TA, but I doubt he’d go for that… especially not now… maybe in the future… either way, I don’t like burning bridges, and as I said there were plenty of things about TA that I fancied so I’m not going to be bad mouthing him, despite some of the very unpleasant things that he did… aside from that I felt like we had built a good friendship with our relationship, so maybe one day we can be friends again, but til then I’m good… at the same time I’m not gonna deny that some times, random things remind me of him or that I don’t think about him, especially when I lay my head down to go to sleep at night, that he doesn’t cross my mind, but for me I expected that, what I didn’t expect was that it doesn’t make me cry… I would have normally expected a tear or two, but I’ve got nothing, which if nothing else is a self check that I made the best decision for me at the time…


Last night I when to a Soca club in central London… the music was great, the dancing was energetic and amazing and I just had a really good time… hadn’t danced like that in ages and it felt good to just go out dancing with some friends… not looking for a man or anything of the sort, just hanging with the girls and having a good night… and while I had a great time, I sure did regret it this morning when my alarm went off at 6:45am and I had to get up for work after like 4 hours of sleep…. I am on my second cup of coffee and its not even 10am yet… going out again to night with a different friend, going to get some drinks and then heading into the city to see what’s happening…

Life goes on and I only have two options… sit back and regret over what’s happened and let life pass me by or get on with my life knowing that I did what I thought was best for me… well if you can’t tell, I’m getting on with life and enjoying myself in London… so one of my friends is coming to visit from April 7th til the 16th, then I’m leaving with her and going to the states on the 16th til the 25th, then one of my best buddies is coming to visit from April 30th til the 5th of May, then my sister and her friend come at the end of May… even if I wanted to be sad, I don’t have the time, between making new friends, catching up with old ones, having my friends and sister coming to visit me, school, my new job (I’ll write more about my new job later) and exploring the social scene in London… so as I said.. I’m good