You know the issue with having an anonymous blog, is that its anonymous, but that's also the great thing about it... I made the mistake of mentioning to my ex, L, that i had a blog and now he wants to read it.... by all means, i wouldn't have an issue with that except for some of the posts are about him or have mentioned him in then... but then again, i think most of the stuff is stuff that he already knows... except for maybe he doesn't realize how sensitive i am or can be when it come to him in general... oh, i wish i had kept my mouth shut...

as I was talking to one of my co-workers, i realized what today was... is the 25th of September (it was two years ago, on this date that i met my ex, L ...) its weird that i still remember, but i'm a dates/numbers type of person... anyways, that's not really an excuse, but it was just something that popped into my head...

today is one of those days at work where u feel like doing absolutely nothing and hope that the next time you look up it'll be time to go home... i'm going to go and look like i'm busy...

Its Friday!

Its finally friday... now usually on a friday i leave work early... head straight to the mall to go find a new outfit to wear out tonight... go home for a few minutes... then head out to a happy hour with my girls, then jump from bar to bar or party... oh, how i miss those days (granted all that just stopped 2 weeks ago... but whatever)... that was a typical friday for me... you could always bet on me and my two girls, AB & NN, to go out on friday nite, party all night then pass out in the weee early hours of the morning... but now i'm looking forward to a nice long workout at the gym, a little running (bout a mile or two)... then go home cook dinner, relax... maybe a little tv, then off to bed cuz i gotta be up early for my running in the morning... now, y the drastic change in life style, well first of all i've partied enough for a while i needed a break and secondly i'm preparing for a marathon (26.2 Miles) that's in January and i want to make sure that i com both physically and emotionally ready for this hugh change... and honestly I don't mind the change in weekend events cause now i'm more rested and i feel better in general... and it helps on cutting out the drinkin and all that great stuff... AB & NN are running in this marathon as well, so they're not going to be partying or going out quite as much either... I may go out on saturday evening though, it my cousin's birthday (you know how in Nigeria everyone is your cousin/aunt/uncle...) so i may go out with them (still on my 2 drink limit) even though i'm not on the best terms with this cousin... she over stepped her position and i quickly had to let herknow i didn't appreciate it... but that's a story for another day...

anyways, I spent most of the morning talking to my ex thru email... he lives in a different country... this is the same ex that i've written about in my early posts... anyways, my friends don't understand how i can be such good friends with him or any of my other exs... well for me, if the relationship didn't end badly (as in he was mis-treating me) then i don't see a reason for not being friends... granted i am friends with the ex that cheated on me, but it took me a long time to become friends with him and it took a big part of me to forgive him... anyways, i enjoy talking to the ex that over seas... sometimes i'm reminded of exactly why i fell in love with him and then of course there are time when i think what the hell did i ever see in him... but lucky for him the pros always outway the cons... and there is one thing about him that makes him different from the rest of my exs, he's the guy i thought i would marry and have his children, but apparently that wasn't meant to be... maybe its still possible, but who knows, i can't wait around and see i have to keep living my life and just take it one day at a time...

I got a re-newed energy to writing in my blog again... after reading some other people's blogs and realizing that my life is much life others...

So i went out last nite with girls (you'll hear about them alot, these are my main two girls, and we have other girls that come along occasionally... anyways, AB & NN... me and AB tend to see more eye to eye on things, and NN is a fairly new addition to the group, but she adds some a new dimension to the our crew of friends... and of course i'm the only Naija babe in the group... but we're all from foreigners or from the islands)...
anyways, we just went to a happy hour and dinner yestersday... yea, i know that from my last post i said i was decreasing the amount of drinking that i do (yeah, i am... I'm on a limit of 2 drinks per day (ALL DAY, No exceptions)...) so as my girls were drinking away, i gently stopped after my second drink and chilled with water for the rest of the evening, which wasn't so bad... anyways, we left the happy hour spot, ate dinner and on our way back to da car, we stopped in at this other happy hour nite spot... the promotor was being over zealous, so we decided to step in for a few minutes just to check it out... the place was nice actually, wasn't alot of people there yet but it was still cool... now the promotor, S, should have been smart and offered to buy a drinks (where i would have ordered a cup of water ;-))... but being that he was a Naija guy, he of course was being cheat and didn't do such... now, let's get it straight, my girls and I are young professionals, we go out alot, we spend money... we make decent to good money, we don't need a guy to buy us drinks or anything like that, but the offer would have been nice... anyways, of course he starts talking to me in yoruba.... hmmm, ok... so anyways, he's like where's your boyfriend... well i don't particularly have one at the moment... Oh, so when can i take you to dinner... how bout you start with a conversation and we'll see where that goes... blah blah blah... we exchanged numbers.. turns out S is 33... yeah, that's 9 years older than me, that's an issue for me... especially if being a promotor is your main gig (which i hope its not, everyone needs a side hussle, but promoting can't be your main gig, at least not at that age...) and I did take notice that he didn't offer to get me and my friends drinks which is just a prelude of his charactor/behavior (offering would have been the polite thing to do and you gotta notice the small things early on, cause they are clues to what an individual is really like once the representative is gone) and I must admit, i thin 33 is a bit old for me... but i guess we'll see what happens...

I've had my fair share of expereinces with the naija guys in da Bmore/DC area... needless to say, i haven't been overly impressed with my experiences... actually thought of moving out of MD for a bit to get away from the small Nigerian circle here...

After all the craziness of my party weekend… and now that I’m all grown and all that… its time to move on to the next phase of my life… Now I’m training for a marathon… yes me… little old me is training to do a marathon and raising money for the marathon as well… the marathon is such a great achievement!!!
So apparently some of my friends think I drink too much sometimes (WHAT!!!) ok, I do admit that I can definitely throw it down with the best of them, but I don’t drink THAT much… anyways, one Friday evening one of my friends stopped by my job to pick up some food and we were talking and he just inferred that I’m not at my best when I drink and that people don’t say the nicest things about me when I drink… and I simply said to him, so what… am I suppose to go around worried about what a bunch of young minded think they know about me… truth is we’re all not on the page or path in life, so they can judge me… I’ve accomplished so much for my age, so what if I want to party hard now while I can… I didn’t do all the crazy stuff they did while in college, its that same crazy stuff they did that got them spending an extra semester or year(s) in college just to get their first degrees… these are the same people who are still working on their first degree while I’ve finished my second degree… please don’t misunderstand me ( I know everyone works on a different path and timeline), but how can they have the nerve to talk about me when they can’t get their shit together… I have a plan for my life, for my future and just cause I don’t go sharing it with them they think that I’m just drinking my life away… whatever man… I must admit, I do drink… actually I drink a lot, but not everyday… just once or twice (at the most) a week when I go out with my friends, why is it any of their concern anyways, I know they’re not in it for my well being, so they should just mind their own business…

anyways, this all bring me to a comedy show I was watching the other day where the comedian was saying that having haters mean that you’re obviously doing something with yourself… no one would hate on you if u didn’t have something they wanted, whether it be looks, money, success and so on… it made some sense to me… so for all those haters… please hate on, cause that just means I’m doing some right!

Interesting Weekend...

I celebrated my birthday this past weekend… had a huge party which was a real success… a lot of people came out to help me celebrate… from what I do remember, I had a blast and so did everyone around me… the next morning however was not so pleasant! I’m one of those drunk people that people can tell you’re a little tipsy, but never quite look or act drunk… so my friend kept buying me drinks (little did they know or realize how gone I was that night)…

I was talking to a guy, C, that I dated briefly last year… and his birthday is a couple of days after mines, and we just happen to get in touch again… I called him in the morning to say happy birthday and then he called me later that night… he was really down… told me how some girl he use to deal with a couple years back called him and told him the reason things ended with them was cause he was too arrogant… now I don’t think that C is that arrogant or at least I never noticed it… I mean we did stop talking cause there was something that he said to me one night over the phone that didn’t sit well with me, I don’t remember what it was… but I do remember him apologizing the next day… but for some reason I couldn’t get past it, so after that I was done… me and C actually think a lot alike, we have a lot in common and see things the same way… and yesterday he told me that he had wanted me to be his girlfriend until I disappeared on him… I thought that was really interesting, I honestly didn’t know what to say… I think what shocked me was that I just can imagine someone wanting ME to be their girlfriend… I mean its not such an outlandish idea, but it just threw me off that all…

I’ve been talking to my ex, which I’ll call ex- L (check out this post, it explains ex)... Ex-L and I have been talking quite a bit lately… his birthday is about a week and a half before mines… anyways, sometimes he says things that make me think that he wants or is considering the idea of me and him getting back together… I was reading some of the old emails (since we don’t write letters anymore) that me and ex-L use to send each other… some of those emails are so emotional and touching, I would have never guessed that things would have ended up the way they did… like we were head over heels in love with one another... he called me on my birthday, and he was just so sweet… it was almost the same guy that I feel in love with 2 years ago… as a matter of fact, what would have been out 2 year anniversary is coming up at the end of the September… I know that he’ll remember just like I remember… and we’ll do what we usually do… talk about the would of, could of and should ofs of our relationship… then we go back to acting like everything is normal… I sent ex-L the unedited pictures from my birthday party, and there were quite a few pictures of me chilling with guys, one guy in particular there were a bunch of picture of me and dancing and hugging and so on… I don’t think ex-L was very pleased with that…

Anyways, after talking to C for a while longer… he asked if we could get together , so me and C are gonna meet up for drink one sometime soon… but I hope he remembers my rule about never going back to date an ex or someone you’ve dated in the past…

things i learned this weekend...

So, this weekend was interesting… I got some rest and just chilled out… went to a party on Sunday night… where I saw a bunch of old friends and a few Exs (this area isn’t that big, luckily the 2 exs didn’t know each other)… Anyways, I was talking to my one ex, K… ex K and I stopped dating like 3 years ago, but we’re still friends and he was quite tipsy and I was a little intoxicated myself, but no where near tipsy… anyways, he spent most of the night flirting with me, which didn’t bother me much cause one we’re friends, two, I’m single and three, he knows that I wouldn’t really do anything with him anyways (but ex K did manage to get a kiss from me while we were on the dance floor, it was just a small peck, but he did it so unexpectedly I didn’t have much time to react, so I just played it off)… anyway, so later on towards the end of the evening, my more recent ex, G, showed up… G and I are also still cool… we stopped talking/dating earlier this year… anyways, apparently me and K were quite close and it was not very pleasing to my ex G, my female friend was watching the whole situation, and she was telling me that at one point when K and I were standing close to one another (ok, very close cause K, had his arm sorta wrapped around me and we were talking)… anyway, ex G, didn’t like it all and was looking pissed off and jealous and then he shook his head as in disbelief… now it would be one thing if we were still dating or hanging out, but me and ex G stopped talking like in April and we just only recently became associates/friends in like the last month or so… so I don’t understand why he would get pissed for me interacting with another guy…
Anyways, it doesn’t matter to me, but I just don’t understand… that whole thing about ex G looking pissed and acting jealous was so not his style, like he likes to believe that he’s super mature (which G is most of the time, but he’s still young and he should enjoy his youth instead of trying so hard to be older)… him showing an emotion of jealousy was just not him and it kinda threw me off… don’t get me wrong I definitely know the G cared about me when we were ‘dating’ and all and I’m sure he still cares about me and an individual and as a human being, but for him to be jealous or for him to even let that emotion show just was unexpected…

Another thing I learned this weekend… apparently I’m a huge flirt… now, its not the first time someone has told me this... and I’m sure it won’t be the last time… but I don’t do it intentionally most of the time… to me I’m just being friendly and nice… but apparently I’m a flirt (I’ve had a couple of ex-boyfriends tell me that as well as some friends)… but my friend that I went to the party with on Sunday told me that I was being very flirtatious with my ex K at the party, but I was just being friendly and just chilling…

I'm having a party soon... my ex G is invited, so are most of my other exs (cause I'm friends or associated with most of my exs) and my crush... its gonna be very interesting...

I remember this one time after me and this one guy broke up a few years ago and we were just talking and I asked him what bothered him about me and he said I was really flirtatious (that was the first time someone had every called me flirtatious)… and that it bothered him with I flirted with other guys while we were dating (the crazy thing to me was that I thought I had not been or overly friendly to other people because I kept in mind that I had a bf)… and I asked him why didn’t he tell me that while we dating instead of just letting it bother him… and he replied, ‘it also part of the reason I’m so attracted to you and that its so ingrained in your personality as a person and that sometime your friendliness can be seen as being flirtatious…’ anyways long story short, he liked me being flirtatious just not to other people… which is understandable…
Its rare that I have to try to be flirtatious with a guy, I’m usually just being the friendly person that I am…